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02-12-2003, 12:09 PM

Aaaahh... Drugstore cowboys. Besides the ostrich boots they also have creaking saddles. A creaking saddle on a ride becomes quite annoying after a while. 
They're also called "dudes", hence the "dude ranches". But let's face it they can be a lot of fun. 
Like: 
-"Ma'am, do you plan to go on the ride with sandals?" 
-"Welle why not?" 
-"That's OK, Ma'a

02-12-2003, 12:21 PM

They also have creaking saddles.... 
Besides falling off your horse, there's nothing more aggravating that a creaking saddle. 
There is also the sandal number.. 
-"Do you plan to go on the ride with sandals?" 
-"Well, why not?" 
-"That's OK, the rattlers and the tarantulas won't mind..." 
-"....Come to think of it I'll go put my boots on..." 
-"Yeah.. You just do that..." 
My friend Mike, rodeo rider and dude wrangler used to have a few lines like that: 
-"What's my horse's name?" 
-"That one's called Crazy Killer, Ma'am.." 
Or: "You never rode before? That's quite alright, we'll give you a horse that's never been ridden, you'll get along jeeest fine.." 
And so on.. 
Dude ranches are great fun and a great way to learn horse riding. 
Come to think of it horse riding should be mandatory in school... 
But that's only because I'm a frustrated fanatic. There are no quarter horses and no prairies to ride around Paris..

Caius Fabius · 02-12-2003, 05:26 PM

I invited my Ukrainian friends to come to visit and ride horses. They replied that they were not aristocrats, they couldn't ride. I told them in Oklahoma, anyone was allowed to learn to ride! Of course, in the cities it is not required, but there are riding stables all about! 
 
I had a horse that was neckrein trained. You could ride her bareback and just touch her neck with your finger to guide her. I used to ride down to the swimming pool, (where I worked). I was wearing my swim suit and sandals. (If you wear sandals around spiders and snakes, your eyes become more observant of your surroundings.) 
 
There are large, non-poisoness snakes called "Black Racers". As the horse, (with me riding) and the dog went through the field, the dog spied a snake, and chased it. The snake climbed the nearest tree trunk, which was unfortunantly the leg of my horse. My horse was usually calm, but this was shocking to her. She decided the way to get ride of the snake was to buck it off. She didn't remember I was also riding. Lucky for me a large thick patch of wild blackberry vines broke my fall. 
 
Moral of the story? uhhhh, no moral, just something to make you grin, a guy in swimsuit in a patch of stickers because he was too confidant in his horse riding ability.

02-13-2003, 04:27 PM

It seems that every area of specialization has its own variety of special 'stupid new guy' tricks... 
 
when I was in the navy, it was dressing the new guy out with safety harness, hard hat, rubber boots, whatever else you could think of... and a boat hook. you stand him out on the deck of the ship and tell him he's the mail bouy watch, and when the bouy (supposed bouy with supposed mail bag attached) comes by, he needs to snag it with the boat hook. how else does a ship get mail when it's at sea, after all? 
or for the snipes, it was giving the new guy all the above mentioned equipment, but instead of the boat hook, it was a length of fishing line with a snickers bar attached. have hime stand on the deck plates in the hottest noisiest area of the engine room, and have him dangle the snickers bar in the bilge to lure out the "bilge rat", or feeding tuna to the 'shaft seal' ,a large variety of other tricks are likewise available. 'head' lights, chow line, sound-powered phone batteries, lowering the mast for bridges,buckets of steam, etc. 
 
in the Army artillery, the new guy gets sent for chem-light batteries or a box of grid squares. (found on maps),he gets sent to sergeant so-and -so for a 'prick E-7', he gets to tap the sides of the armored vehicles with a hammer to look for 'weak spots', and is told to yell 
down the howitzer tubes to perform the ' boom check'. again, the laughs just keep on rollin in if you have a suitably gullible victim. 
 
in rescue/ firefighting, the general public supplies enough comic relief, that the new guy tricks can be dispensed with, plus, tricks like this can be dangerous in rescue world. 
 
my strange sense of humor has always kept me chuckling at these jokes, although I feel much empathy for the new guy (or new-person) involved. fortunately for me, I've always been 
cynical enough not to fall for these tricks when I'm the new guy. they always make for fun anecdotal stories though. 
 
Gaius Marius Aquilus 
 
Edited by: <A HREF=http://pub45.ezboard.com/bromanarmytalk.showUserPublicProfile?gid=gaiusmariusaquilus>Gaius Marius Aquilus</A> <IMG HEIGHT=10 WIDTH=10 SRC="http://images.honesty.com/imagedata/h/573/16/257626.jpg" BORDER=0> at: 2/13/03 5:32:48 pm

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